A Vague Journey Through Burgers: The Lord Nelson, Southwark

Having just finished my first ever Pilates class, I met Paul who proudly undid my good work by suggesting that we tried The Lord Nelson for a drink. It had been recommended to him by someone else, someone who clearly enjoys a ramshackle mish mash of furniture.

“I feel like my gym clothes aren’t quite cutting it in here. Or maybe they’re really cutting it. There’s a lot to take in.”

Suarez

A distracting and disturbing decoration, in equal measure. #Suarez #Rawr

I ordered an Appletiser, to be healthy, and a beer, to treat myself. The name was funny. I can’t remember it. It was nice. Do feel free to ask for another of my recommendations.

We had a chat and a drink for a while and I kept glancing at the menu.

I was intrigued by the menu as, outside the pub, The Lord Nelson proudly proclaimed that it had the “best burgers in London”.

The waiting staff came round to tell us that the kitchen was closing. We both half looked at the menu. I was intrigued by some of the items. The waiting staff took the menus. Paul went to retrieve the menus and we perused.

The two that intrigued me the most was The Elvis (topped with peanut butter and bacon), which Paul went for, and the Hoff (served with calamari), which I had. Apparently The Hoff has actually eaten The Hoff at The Lord Nelson. Good for him, and for them.

At £10.50 and £14 respectively, they’re not the cheapest burgers around. But the portions are quite something. “Good luck”, said the waiter when he gave us our dishes, then “well done” when he collected them and saw that I had finished.

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First, The Hoff. I had kind of expected the calamari to be in the burger – and I ended up doing so – but I should have read the menu more carefully I suppose as it does say “surf and turf style”. I like calamari and I like burgers, but it was nothing really to write home about.

I often feel like a Joey in Friends with the beef wellington trifle: as long as there are foods that I like, I could eat them alongside each other with no qualms.

The burger was less burnt than it looks here, but it fell apart and required me to eat it with a knife and fork like a damn lady that I am not. It was a little dry so I slathered it with ketchup. The chips were good.

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On paper, peanut butter seems to be somewhat of an odd burger topping. Especially with bacon. I’ve seen this around a few places, so maybe it’s the topping du jour. And it should be! I’m in quite a peanut butter phase at the moment, eating sandwiches (yep, people still eat those) daily, and yesterday having a peanut butter and oreo cheesecake (from The Ship Tavern. I would recommend it. The roast was recommended but, aside from the meat, it was only so-so), so put peanut butter on anything (anything?!) and I’m happy. It brings out the saltiness of the bacon and the meatiness of the burger. I only had two bites but I immediately wished that I had ordered it instead. Call me a heathen, call me a convert, but I would happily call a peanut butter burger a winner.

Alas, though, The Lord Nelson is not the best burger in London. It is up there as a pub burger, and the toppings are good for when you’re feeling adventurous, but when you get down to the meat of the matter, there are several places that are a-better.

6.5/10: Filling.

The Lord Nelson, 243 Union Street, Southwark, London, SE1 OLR

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